My Noughties

Inspired by the BBC's "The Noughties, was that is?" - I have decided to check to see if I was in the noughties!

100 - The Millennium - I never believed that anything was going to happen to the computers and didn't visit the Experience
099 - Flash Mobs - The only one I ever witnessed was the group at Victoria station who danced and listened to their ipods all at once
098 - Jukebox Musicals - I've never been to a jukebox musical, in fact I've only seen about 3 musicals in my life
097 - Tanorexia - I have never been on a sunbed or used tanning lotion and don't plan on starting any time soon
096 - David Cameron as leader of Tories - Never voted for either Labour or Conservative and it's unlikely that I ever will
095 - CCTV - I dislike them for being too invasive and don't think that they are doing the job that they were brought in to do
094 - Kabbalah - Never been interested in it, and equally neither have I been to a Scientology seminar
093 - Celebrity Baby Names - I don't have any kids of my own, but I've always thought that parents don't think enough about baby names
092 - Sporting Boomerang - I followed our ashes win and olympics, but our soccer team suck and will never forget the 'Hand of Crouch'
091 - Coffee - I have always liked simple tea, coffee and hot-chocolate, and its a mystery why it suddenly got complicated
090 - Charity Fatigue - Charity starts at home and I hate the high street menace that accosted you walking around town
089 - Space Tourism - Nice idea, but I think there are far too many places on this planet that I haven't been to yet
088 - Nanny State - I think we have gone too far, that its totally wrong and it really is political correctly gone insane
087 - Blogging - Well, if your reading this then do you really even need to guess what my views and experience of this one is?
086 - The Davinci Code - Read half of it when I was in the Dominican Republic and finished it when I got back to the UK
085 - Metrosexuals - I am not a Metrosexual man ... I just don't care enough about my own look enough, though maybe I should!
084 - Celebrity Weddings - I hate weddings as a rule and I would never spend money to find out about any Celebs wedding
083 - China - I have been there three times and am trying to start a business there, its just not my favourite non UK destination
082 - Internet Shopping - I do some, but not much, mainly just Ebay / Amazon and travel tickets
081 - Wembley Woe - I visited the stadium long enough to take a few pictures, but that's about it
080 - Athiest - For me its about my own logic, belief and moral compass and how it clashed with all the organised religions
079 - Wellbeing - I like to try and be more happy and I don't really care about finding what are my intolerances
078 - The British Are Coming - Apparently we stormed Hollywood & the US, all I can say is that I love Hawaii but not Vegas
077 - Hoodies - I actually got kicked out my local supermarket cos I had the hood of my rainmack up as I walked in, outside it was -1 degree
076 - Art for Art's sake - I'd say no to Damien Hurst. Bansky is interesting but it's still graffiti at the end of the day
075 - Primani - I do shop in Primark myself, as I would have to be rich before I'd spend a fortune on nothing but clothes
074 - DVD - I rarely view a DVD's extra features, but mainly as the extras are hardly ever worth watchinh
073 - High Definition TV - I don't own one, but my friends huge flatscreen tv is ace for watching movies
072 - Nepotism - Celebrities hold no interest for me and relatives of z-list celebrities even less, if that's possible
071 - SatNav - The worst car crash I ever had was caused by me distracting the driver over their stupid SatNav
070 - The Parenting Boom - Too many children having kids of their own & too many idiotic people cloning themselves
069 - Size Zero - Size 8 to 12 are the ideal sizes for women ( as in they have curves ) and anyone below that is just flat
068 - Organic Food - If it wasn't double the price, half the flavour and hard to get hold of then I possibly would buy more
067 - Properties & Estate Agents - I own my own house but through an unusual set of circumstances I am not living there at the moment
066 - ASBOS - Just what every wannabe gangster wanted - free government issued badges of dishonor that prevent nothing
065 - Celebrity Adoption - If they can't have kids of their own then fine, but just for a status symbol, gimme a break
064 - Drugs Reclassification - I have friends that smoke but I have always kept my own distance and objections on Cannabis
063 - Celebrity Virgins - WFT ... I don't know and don't care, but I'd never marry someone I had not had sex with
062 - Shock Docs - Bizarre medical complaints televised ... give me House MD anyday
061 - Take That #2 - What is this doing on a list of important things that happened in the decade, is this a joke
060 - Obesity - Same as with 'Size Zero' (069) - What happened to normal shaped people, we are becoming a minority
059 - Botox & Facelifts - If you are disfigured / ugly then its ok, otherwise its just vanity taken to the extreme
058 - Business TV - I do have a guilty pleasure of liking Dragons Den and the Apprentice, if only for the morons who go on it
057 - Internet Dating - I just knew that this was going to crop up, and what a pile of crap there is out there these days
056 - Queens Golden Jubilee - I didn't celebrate it, didn't even realise it had happened this decade
055 - Free Running - I loved it as an idea and in movies, but you won't catch me doing it as im just not that flexible
054 - Personal Transport - Especially the Segway, I've ignored tours if they were featuring them and the micro scooter is a toy
053 - Sushi - I actually like it and am slowly building up a tolerance for wasabi mustard
052 - Festival - I have been to a couple, but they are normally too boring, too crowded and too much sitting around waiting
051 - Celebrity Outlaws - There is no higher class of civilians just cos your a celeb and they should be punished equally
050 - Yoga - Never tried it, but enjoyed watching the Chinese practice Tai-Chi with a beatbox in the alley behind the hotels
049 - Doctor Who - Another guilty pleasure, I have enjoyed David Tennant's reincarnation of the Doctor
048 - Celebrity Rage - So many of these are about Celebs and its the same arguement, they are only human
047 - Fad Diets - I am lucky enough to be fairly healthy, fairly active and fairly young thus I don't yet need any special diet
046 - The Makeover Boom - Some people suggests that I need one, as my clothes fashion stinks but it wont happen
045 - Girls Aloud - Erm ... Soft porn for Top of the Pops with only average songs at best, but sexy nonetheless
044 - The Bush Years - Possibly the worst 8 years in American political history and glad they are behind us
043 - Congestion Charge - Just yet another stealth charge to the average motorisms and sadly spreading beyond London
042 - Mobile Ringtones - Overly loud. Thankfully I have got a quiet one that is also fairly inoffensive
041 - Medical Marvels - Nice idea in theory but too many resourced being gobbled by the few, I prefer natural selection
040 - The Smoking Ban - It might be healthy for all but its been the death of the good old british boozer
039 - Coldplay - Um ... another average band but nothing special, and I have no idea why they are on the list
038 - Carbon Footprint - I try to recycle, use only what I need and don't drive but I won't pay extra to offset
037 - Paedogeddon - It is a mental problem, not a criminal choice, so why not kill them as they cannot be rehabilitated
036 - Lads Mags - Never read one, but they seem to be yet another soft porn magazine just with fast cars
035 - WAG - Yet more celebrity nonsense. I could never pull one, afford one or keep one, in fact I prefer real women
034 - Teenage Parties - Well I'm no teenager anymore, and I hated hosting them but it was the only way to get invited
033 - Games Consoles - I did own a PS2 but I gave it to my ex as a leaving present, it worked and she left. I also like guitar hero
032 - Electric Car - I don't drive, but like the idea and would probably get one if it was practical for me
031 - Dogging - Never tried it and not sure if I'd want to but I have been caught having sex outdoors in the past
030 - Binge Drinking - Never been a big fan of alcohol and rarely even have a drink let alone get drunk
029 - Celebrity Brands - I buy stuff I can afford from a brand I think I can trust, not because a celeb endorses it
028 - The Wire - The most dull cop show I ever watched, and that was because I had nothing better to do
027 - Celebrity Newspapers - Not another celeb entry, does it never stop. Read my lips, "I DON'T CARE"
026 - EMO - Technically I'm closer to a EMO than a GOTH or a CHAV but that's not saying much.
025 - Mobile Phone - Mine is 4 years old and most of the time its switched off, though might like a blackberry
024 - Posh Cider - I have always been a cider drinker, now I just have more choice
023 - Harry Potter - I kind of like the films but have not read any of the books and probably never will
022 - Genital Topiary - On a woman I prefer a Hollywood strip to a full Brazilian but on me its a tried and tested no
021 - High School Musical - I am not a parent so I missed this whole kiddie band wagon with this one
020 - Celebrity Chefs - Celebrities , again ... If I want a recipy of a new idea I will ask one of my sisters, not a prat on tv
019 - The Credit Crunch - Yes, I regrettably contributed to this and am currently financially screwed a sa result
018 - Jordan vs Katie - Ugh ... where is the vomit bucket. She was good looking as a teenager but on turning 19 went insane
017 - Celebrity Rehab - Yet more Celebs. Look, just take them away and don't ever bring them back
016 - Roasting - I didn't know what it was til now, have never done it and don't know any couple I'd want to do this with
015 - Youtube - I like it for viewing music video clips or funny clips off of emails but that's about it
014 - Ballroom Blitz - I don't dance, and though I like watching women dance not when its celeb couples
013 - Pandemics - I've never really lost sleep over any of them and it doesn't stop me doing anything
012 - Mac of PC - I am a not a Mac or a PC, but I do enjoy using my very inexpensive laptop, which happens to be an Esystems
011 - The War On Terror - What a load of phony excuses to funds war profiteers and for Bush to stay in power
010 - Barack Obama - I was travelling when I heard that he won but it was no surprise as he was the only candidate on tv
009 - Realitiy TV - I saw some of the first UK Big Brother series but the later series and its competition ... not really
008 - Jade Goody - The biggest WTF and OMG on the whole list, the sooner we forget and move on the better
007 - Social Networking - I'm on facebook, as are most of my family and friends, but nothing beats real conversation
006 - CHAV - ok, so it came from Kent, but that's as close to a CHAV as I ever want to be associated
005 - The Blair Years - The only thing I can really say is that I lived through them and am glad that they are behind me
004 - Gay Marriage - I'm not gay but I see nothing wrong and if it makes economic and emotional sense then why not
003 - Google - At last, one that I can really get behind. I use this google almost every day and am very happy with it
002 - Simon Cowell - I watch the first few rounds of X-factor and Britains got Talent, but I could do so without Simon
001 - Text Messages - The easiest way to start an accidental argument with a friend or partner. Acceptable for small details

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Looking back, I would say that I am not a very noughties person, despite it having the best years of my life so far.

My sister asked me to try and put a figure on my % of noughtiness, so after going over it a few times, and rouding up or down as I saw fit, I would say that I was aware of 90% of the things on the list, that I agree that around 60% of them should be on the list as important, but I was only happy that 40% of them were on the list.
Looking forward, I have no idea of what the teenies will herald, but I am hoping to get out of debt, find a job I like, finish writing my travel book, learn to drive, not be living in a country at war, be happy, be healthy and be free of serious illness and disease.

It was worth it after all

While undeniably my greatest adventure to date ended this April, despite being in a rather tricky financial situatoin ever since I still give thanks for my courage and determination to make it come true.

Although some days I do very little, most days when I am out and about I am nearly always finding a good link into one of my travelling stories, and its only through a mixture of modesty, humility and good sense that I prevent myself from launching into another rambling episode at every drop of the hat.

But the fact remains, that almost every day something sparks a happy memory and then just for the briefest of moments I am once again away in a far off land with a rucksack on my back and snapping images that no one else I know have seen for themselves.

Thankfully the depression and the misery of being forever rained on is dwindling with each remenise, whereas the gloriously different people I met become more vivid, though possibly now with slighly exagerated traits.

Spoil Vote In Action

Rage Against The Machine - The Spoil Vote Effect

This weeks music headlines have made me more happy and proud to be British than I have in many a year, but I just hope that its significant is not lost on the masses.

For as long as I can remember, the fight for the UK Christmas No. 1 song at the top of the charts has always been a close battle between perhaps two or three songs, with the rest so far behind as to not be considered also-rans.

The choices will normally be one current pop group, one in-form solo artist and maybe a dodgy charity organised song, but all of them will have invested thousands if not millions in advertising and promoting their songs and ensure it will have been shoved down our throats the second that Halloween is over.

Sadly this pretty much became a one horse affair when the x-Factor came along and hijacked the race as it's winner was pretty much guaranteed the top spot, them winning through the 'popular vote' barely days before the Christmas week starts.

However as anyone with real nouse and intelligence could tell you, the show itself is firmly rigged from the get go, with many great artists not even being given an on screen audition and adding insult to injury allowing a number of dodgy contestants to be deftly escorted through to the final to increase viewing and to seal how the shows final voting will go.

So the fact that a zero budget facebook group managed to prevent yet another manufactured pop idol be gifted the coveted Christmas No 1. spot, was a big fuck you to the establishment and to Simon Cowell, or at least that is how it what is was meant to be.

But why should I care so much and feel so proud that an American sourced internet online community helping a 17 year old American re-release top the UK charts, well because it has shown that the British public do have a choice, a real choice.

You see, for far too long we have been blindly going down dead end alleys, purely because on so many key issues we have been lied to and tricked into making a string of bad choices and all because we were publicly only offered two or three choices and all seemed bad.

It is like a standard 4 option questionnaire that asks you, do you want to be killed by a) a speeding car, b) a cancer, c) a rebellious teenager or d) a foreign terrorist? The very obvious answer is e) none of the above, I want to live a happy and healthy life thank you very much, but that wasn't an option you could choose.

Yes, for far too long we have allowed our blinkered eyes to only see the choices set down for us, instead of taking time out and thinking for ourselves what we really want.

What I like so much about this is that up until early December the media, tv and newspapers were all saying that whoever won the X-Factor would have the chat No 1. and only a Svengali or long odds gambler would have bet against it, as that is all that our options appeared to be. So when along came the facebook group that offered us an alternate choice I am so glad that so many people jumped at the chance to say that they too wanted a extra e) option all of their own and that their choices has been made for them long enough.

Now this kind of thing is unlikely to be repeated on a regular basis, and I'm not suggestting that we allow facebook groups to dictate our options any more than the we should the tv or radio, but I am hoping that the fact that 'we do always have a choice AND more than one choice, no matter how last minute or left field it might appear to be', is not lost in the confusion and celebration.

I mean, how liberating it would be on a public general election day, if everyone was to realise that a spoiled vote meant infinitely more than just not bothering to turn up. Equally, that if enough "other" candidates get elected then there would be sufficient reason to keep out any of the existing political parties, parties that clearly only exist to support themselves and their expensive lifestyles.

3D Film Avatar

There is no doubt that the film is expensive, gloriously looking and an epic but will it set the benchmark for all future movies.

When my brother in law told me that we were going to see Avatar at the cinema over the Christmas holidays I had not heard anything of the film, not the hype, the budget, the cast or the storyline, only that it was a 3D movie that he was really excited about and wanted to experience with me.

Being a lover of the cinema, especially the imax, I could only wonder what the latest revamping of the 3D films would deliver but to say that I was blown away was an understatement.

In fact, the only thing that could have made the experience better was if the film was indeed able to be shown on an imax screen at that would have made the immersion into the film that one step closer to actually being there.

The film started something like a out of a typical military sci-fi film but quickly evolved and started to reveal its full potential.

The acting got better, the characters got defined and then redefined and it did not matter at all that the end of the film could be guessed from about five minutes in, as it was the getting there that was enjoyable, not the final destination.

If you are expecting plot twists, slight of hand tricks or surprise endings then you might be dissapointed, but for me it was the perfect vehicle for showing how a fantasy and a 3D film should be, about making it look believable, breathtaking but very real all at the same time.

The characters and monsters made sense, the plants and forests didnt just come to life to fight the bad guys like you might have expected and regretted at the same time, and though the message of eco vs technology and resource raping corporations is a bit heavy handed, i didnt mind in the slightest.

I can only imagine with bated breath what the next fantasy or sci-fi movie of this calibre will be, and if it has acting and story even half worthy then it will go far.

I did have a few pet dislikes over the film, one being that yet again the lovely Michelle Rodriguez was killed off before the end credits, but as usual i loved the character, instantly felt at ease and knew that she was going to be one of the goodies through til the end.

Another slight peeve was some of the names and the fact that there did not seem to be enough depth or background to any of the other main characters of the story, but regardless of that a film that lasted 163 minutes whizzed by and almost a day later I still want to go back but not to see it again, to see more!

Possibly because it cost so much, because its longer than most, because its the first 3D film in ages, because it looks so damn good or a hundred other reasons, but this film is getting a lot of publicity and buzz and I for one want it to continue, if for not other reason than to encourage other film makers to take up the challenge and produce their own fantastic film.

Fast tracked sainthoods

Now I don't normally go bashing anyone for their beliefs, but the latest news to hit the headlines has, to my mind at least, started to stretch credulity a bit too far.

We already have fast food, fast cars and fast weddings and now the church are about to give us fast sainthood's!

Leading on from the gathered crowds chant of "santu subito" ( 'make him a saint now' or 'saint immediately' ) at the now deceased Pope John Paul II's funeral on April 8th 2005, the current pope and church leaders are in motion to do away with years worth of debating and red tape to streamline the process. In fact Pope Benedict XVI himself has been quoted as saying "do it quickly".

To start with they have done away with the minimum of 5 years after death restriction before allowing the process to be started.

Next, the initial phases of a sainthood which usually take decades, and in some cases has been drawn out over hundreds of years is being streamlined, with Pope John Paul II's own submission having been completed in less than three years.

And finally, in order to become a saint it requires a person to first be beatified following a first approved miracle, and then further elevated to canonisation following a second. However there are strong indications that this second miracle prerequisite is also soon to be abolished.

Now, while this all seems to be good news, I personally feel that this could very well be a slippery slope, especially when you start to take a closer look at recent miracles and their frequency.

During almost a 27 year pontification, Pope John Paul II beautified 1,340 people and canonised 483 saints, meaning that he approved at least 1,823 miracles ( more than 1 every week on average ), which is more than all his predecessors over the past five centuries.

Having researched a few of the miracles recently attributed to saints, many of them involve apparent healing of diseases of removing of dangerous cancers, often never actually involving direct physical contact with the saint, and which in all fairness could be nothing more than a mis-diagosis by the attending physician.

Furthermore, Pope John Paul II's own miracle is said to be the curing of a nun in Aix-en-Provence (over 600km away) who was suffering with a serious disease.

Apparently she prayed to him for healing and exactly two months after his death she felt better and was 'miraculously' free of her malady, at least according to her doctors and physicians. There is no mention of what might happen if the disease should later reappear, but it is unlikely that it would lead to any retractions.

Now it might be me, but doesn't the news of a man who spent the last three decades of his life seeing miracles ever week waiting until two months after his own death before performing long distance healing from beyond the grave have a rather worrying or ominous overtone.

Or the fact that following an already massive surge in recognised miracles that the Vatican is now streamlining the red tape in order to make more saints and quicker than ever before all seem like the top echelons are just greasing the wheels thus guarantee their own positions?

All I can say is that when I learned that there was a veritable explosion of new saints, with miracles being approved on almost a daily basis, then I have to wonder is the structure and spirituality of it all being diluted. Finally, if miracles are indeed going on every week then why is there still widespread hunger, poverty and conflict causing pain and suffering to millions all around the globe.

Dating Sites

Now, I don't want to just rant and rave about how I was unable to get a date from a website as that might to some seem like sour grapes, and its the furthest from the truth, I just have a view and I want to express it here and will try to provide a few statistics to help show back up my arguement. (and yes yes, I know ... statistics can prove that black is white and up is down and blah, blah, blah - but please, at least wait til you hear what I have to say before you start to trash my viewpoint).

Now in the interests of fair play, I used google and msn and various other search engines to find what was said to be the top 40 free and premium dating websites, based on number of members.

As an athiest who is not into big women, self mutilation, midgets, christians, goths or any other such subsection or community or sexual fetish I excluded from my research all websites dedicated to finding a partner of a specific type or kind and just joined the generic dating sites.

Then, when I had picked my 40, at the end of November ( thus in teh run up to Christmas when people would have most time off and feel most like having someone to be with ) I joined up to all of them.

Yes, on the same day, with the same photo ( or photos ) being good quality high resolution full face and body shots taken in the last year, used the same profile description where possible ( some had maximum or minimum sizes ) and completed all the extra bits about me, including likes, dislikes, hobbies, interestes, films, music, travel, work, etc, etc, etc.

Whenever the website suggested that I was anything less than 100% complete with my profile I took measures to do so, and again when the website moderators were not overly strict I left my direct email address or facebook details in plain sight so that anyone viewing my profile at more than a glance should be able to know where to find me even if we were not both full paying members.

Admittedly I did not actually pay a full months membership to all the websites, as some were as most were around £20 per month, some as high as £35 per month or had a minimum of 3 months upfront fees before enabling you to make full contact, and as I certainly didn't have a few thousand pounds just lying around in my bank account doing nothing I had to limit my costs.

However, I did log use the same login ID and password on all the accounts and also made sure that I logged in at least twice a day for a full week.

With regard to performing a search, I used as close as possible to an identical and fair search pattern of - single women, between 5'1 and 5'10, aged 23 to 36 of either the caucasian, asian, latino, pacific island or mixed background and if available online in the last month and / or within 50 miles, which distance range happens to include much of London.

I didn't much care for if they smoked, if they had kids, what colour hair or eyes they had, what their religious preference were, or what their job or education was ... thus I was keeping my options open to as large a group of women as possible without being totally uncaring.

On many of the websites the choices were remarkably similar, as were the dating sites themselves, suggesting multiple fronts to the same database of women ( or else a whole load of women happend to chose the very same combination of dating sites to advertise themselves on!).

A few of my searches produced less than 5 hits, while others had more but with members who had not been active in over 2 years or with no photos.

Once I found profiles that I liked I winked / flirted / added as favourites / visited profiles / viewed photos / sent e-cards / sent e-flowers / commented on profiles and wrote messages all trying to attract an interest in me or my profile.

I also replied to all messages that I received, if their system would allow it, though a few sites were extra strict and would not even met me see who was writing to me unless I had already agreed to sign up, and they were the websites that I chose to ignore and close down first as they were a total waste of time and effort.

After 2 weeks the results were all very frustrating and not very encouraging. Not only had less than half of my emails been read, but those that did had not always even bothered to view my profile or photos.

I found that certain websites sent me messages that could only be read when i upgraded to a full profile, and on a few rare occasions when I signed up for a 24 hour trial period in order to read such messags, they were almost always automaticallly generated by the website itself to introduce me to other new members, and not actually real interest in my profile at all.

Other websites were merely fronts for premium webcam girls and when i stayed loggin in i woud receive on average one chat request every five minutes and every one was from a girl asking me to verify my age via for free via this certain website ( which reading the small print would also just so happened to charge my credit card over $100 if i didn't also agree to subscribe to at least 2 hardcore porn sites at the same time!)

Throughout all the websites I could tell a theme of a scammer fairly soon as they would include superbly sexy photos, but say they were just after love and that age, race and distance were no object ... which is of course a load of old bull as I doubt even 0.1% of stunning blond 20 year olds in the world would go for an old and ugly guy half way round the world, but according to their profile these ones would!

Some sites were amusing as their own advertising was clearly lying and claiming to have many more members than they possible could have in reality. To prove my point ass a test I picked the postcode in the Outer Hebrides in Scotland and limited my age range to exactly 18 and yet this one website still tried to claim it had over 5,000 women who fitted the category, which was total baloney as the entire island is miles off the mainland coast and only has an overall population of around 21,000!

Again other sites seemed to be the target of Russian, Nigerian or Ghanaian scam artists and even after I amended my profile description on those sites to say " NO RUSSIAN OR AFRICAN WOMEN" they were still the only ones to visit my profile and / or to write me messages - which made me more suspicious still.

To test the theory of whether they were scam artists or not, ( first off not all said that they were from Africa but after a few emails they would want to come clean and tell me the truth, haha! ) I allowed a number of these suspect Russian or African women to start up a email correspondence and usually it only took five very general emails to get to the root of the scam.

Without exception, these scam artists ( or very desperate women!) all fell in love with me, wanted to be with me so very soon but sadly also were unable to and thus needed my financial help as they were unable to get a visa, a flight, a ticket to the airport, a ticket to the main city, etc, etc.

What was unremarkably similar is that none of them would give me a UK mobile, none had access to a webcam or skype and all made pathetic urgent excuses and then log off if my messages got too close to uncovering the truth early. Oh, and of course the second I refused to pay them they all got in a huff and stopped writing to me, without exception.

In the end, after being a member of 40 websites for a complete month, I had made less than 10 confirmed contacts that I felt were real, and they were spread out as far throughout the UK as Scotland from me.

On average 80% of my messages were not replied to, despite from my searches I only chose to actually write direct emails to women that shared many of my own likes and views, well share them at least on paper (or with the computers own compatability rating percentage ).

Now, although I am single and would have very much liked to have found a partner and agreed to go to almost anywhere in the UK for a face-to-face meeting, it did appear that my search was overall fruitless.

It particularly surprised me to find that women just a couple of years older than me and within 5 miles, who (meaning no disrespect) were hardly stunning in the looks department and shared many of the same likes as me still didn't find time to write back to me even though reading their profile they could not find a more suitable match if they lined up all the men in England.

A sad fact was that on many websites I had more genuine appearing messages from women over 45 or overseas than within my own country and age range.

So, removing the girls under age, overage, fakers, scam artists, africans, women with more than 2 kids, women with no photos, women who are greatly independant and women who "dont know why they are doing this, but they were talked into it by a mate and think it might be a bit of fun" over 40 profiles in a month I did not find a single woman that I made a strong connection with enough to give out my phone number and have a good honest and open conversation with.

Around ten women made it as far as adding me to their facebook friends list, but instead of this being a good sign, their interest almost instantly dissappeared and so even when I sent them a private message or fb chat request they ignored them or wrote back one liners to say that they were busy and talk later.

A couple of times I was hassled into giving it out far too soon, and of them one turned out to be african scammer and the othe was a bunny boiler from up north who must have called me a dozen times in one hour leaving offensive messages and I chose to hang up on them earlier and were not picking up their calls.

So what do I conclude from my test of a month?

Well, for starters I still feel that very few attractive and successful women feel the need to put themselves on dating sights, feeling that they would prefer to meet their future match the old fashioned way ... by chance meeting them face to face first.

Furthermore, the majority of women that do go on either add very few additional edscriptive details and / or no photos and of the remaining few that do write something they almost always like "fun men, outgoing, are into pubbing and clubbing as well as a bottle of wine and a dvd at night" - oh and most seem to smoke and have at least 2 children living with them who "are their whole world", thus really looking for a guy that is prepared to be step-dad rather than a date for their own sake.

In fact, despite going on 40 websites including all the free ones I could fine, I had much more luck with dating sites around 10 years ago than I did now, which maybe points to the fact that their popularity with decent women has come and gone, or that as a 23 year old there were just more genuine viable dates going online than do in their late 20's / early 30's.

Or maybe my looks or writing skills have gone way downhill in the last decade, but I dont think thats the case, as I am now more polished in both respects and apart from a tiny good diet belly ( that does not show on most photos ) I feel that I am a better catch now than ever before.

Letter to Russia

Below is an actual reply to an email from yet another person who claims to be a Russian female after a relationship.

Tanya / Oksana / Olga ( delete as appropriate )

You say that you have looked through my profile "several times" and yet failed to see the part that said "No women from Africa or Russia ... I am NOT INTERESTED NO MATTER HOW GOOD YOUR (FAKE) PHOTO LOOKS".

Did you think I was joking or that perhaps that as you are from the autonomous Republic of Crimea and not actually Russia that this did not apply to you?

OK .. I will explain this simply to you.

If that is a real photo of you then yes you are very attractive.

If you was here in the UK then yes I would be very interested in getting to know you better.

If when we met we both found each other to be physically attracted to each other then I would be happy to consider you as my partner til such times as we either got married or split up.

However ... I am NOT rich and I do not send money overseas to people I have never met for any reason whatsoever.

If you can organise (and that includes paying) your own visa, international flight and hotel / apartment in the UK then I would be very interested in hearing more from you.

But I am not interested in exchanging email after email for you to then attempt a pathetic financial scam saying any of the following :-
'your ill; one of your parents are ill; you have no food; your have been robbed; one of your parents have died; you are about to inherit a lot of money; you are unable to pay for your own visa; you are unable to pay for your own flight; you are stranded on holiday and need to get home' or any such like that you have dreamt up to try and separate me from my money.

I also do not want to join any premium webcam services in order to see what you look like on camera ... if you want me to see then you can go on yahoo or msn like anyone else and show me that way.

I have no intention of having my age verified through my credit card via a third party or to pay to receive any erotic photo shots or lingerie that you may have.

In short, if you are selling anything then I am not interested.

I mention this only as you seem to have ignored my 'no russian' section of my profile, so you have brought doubt and uncertainty into the equation and I just want to ensure that you are not a scammer or a copy/paste merchant!, sending the same email to every guy on the same website.

What happens next is up to you, but if you are after anything except an honest and equal relationship in the UK, once you are already here, then I can not and will not help you.

Regards

Mr Springate

Internet Identity

I just did a Google search on myself and found that I had appeared in a few pretty strange places.

So once I ignores direct links of my own blog, blog comments of other peoples profiles I still came up with a few random bits where eitehr myself or my blog entries have popped up  :-

http://globalvoicesonline.org/2009/01/16/fiji-flooding-the-village-drowned/

http://www.therelive.com/2009/01/fiji-floods.html

http://www.liveinternet.ru/showjournal.php?journalid=3100248&tagid=1458806

http://www.douban.com/group/topic/8481634/

http://www.silverlight-travel.com/guilin/?s=dickon+springate

http://www.yasni.de/person/vu/luan/luan-vu.htm

Back in the UK

Well, I did try to make a go of it in Beijing, but it didn't quite go according to plan and so I made a fairly hasty withdrawal and am now back safely ensconced with my family and friends.

Tour Guide to the UK

The UK attracts millions of visitors to its shores every year but 90% leave with no more than the briefest glimpse of the country and with no better understanding of its psyche than with what they arrives with. So to help rectify this I herein attempt to give a brief rundown of the UK, its history and its character, and why Britton's are so fiercely proud of where they come form and why they want to protect what is left of our heritage.

England's capital London is a huge metropolis and home to many of England's most frequented tourist sites, as you might expect covering an overall area of around 36 square miles, so without going into too many details here are some of the highlights.

Buckingham Palace - take the metro to either Victoria or Green Park station

Covent Garden - take the metro to Covent Garden

Big Ben & the Houses of Parliament - take the metro to Westminster

Westminster Abbey - take the metro to Westminster

Trafalgar Square - take the metro to Trafalgar Square

St Pauls Cathedral - take the metro to St Pauls

Royal Albert Hall & Hyde Park - take the metro to Knightsbridge

HMS Belfast - take the metro to London Bridge

Imperial War Museum - take the metro to Elephant & Castle

The Cutty Sark - take the metro and district light railway ( DLR ) to the Cutty Sark station

Harrods - take the metro to Knightsbridge

Leicester Square - take the metro to Leicester Square

China Town - take the metro to Leicester Square

London Eye - take the metro to Waterloo

The Golden Hinde - take the metro to London Bridge

Madam Tussauds - take the metro to Baker Street

The House of Sherlock Holmes, 221b Baker Street - take the metro to Baker Street

Milennium Dome ( now called the O2 centre ) - take the metro to North Greenwich

Tower of London - take the metro to Tower Hill

London Dungeon - take the metro to London Bridge

London Bridge – take the metro to London Bridge

Royal Household Cavalry – take the metro to Westminster

Shakespear's Globe Theatre – take the metro to Covent Garden, Temple or Holborn

Wimbledon Lawn Tennis Courts – take the metro to Wimbledon Park

Tate Modern - take the metro to Southwark or Blackfriars

The Oval Cricket Ground – take the metro to The Oval

A Cruise Up The River Thames – pickup a lift at many of the quays along the Thames Estuary

Hyde Park – take the metro to any of five tube neighbouring exits, such as Hyde Park Corner

Marble Arch – take the metro to Marble Arch

British Museum – take the metro to Holborn

Soho Red Light District – take the metro to Soho

Alexandra Palace – take the metro to Bounds Green. Equally you can take the train to Alexandra Palace Rail station

Shaftsbury Theatre – take the metro to Tottenham Court Road


The Republic of Ireland ( Eire ) and northern Ireland are a land divided by a split in religion and politics, with the larger south being a separate country and the north still ruled by the British government. The Irish are famed for their drinking ( Guiness or whisky ), their gambling, their cheery nature and not to forget the mischievous little leprechauns with their hidden pots of gold.

In the north there is without question a place of magnificent natural wonder and beauty in the Giants Causeway near Antrim.

Train: Services from Belfast or Londonderry to Coleraine. Bus: Causeway Rambler (Ulsterbus No. 376) between Bushmills and Carrick-a-Rede runs in the summer; or Ulsterbus No. 252 is a circular route via the Antrim Glens from Belfast. Both stop at the Causeway. Cycle: NCN route 93 runs past Causeway. Car: On B146, 2 miles from Bushmills.

The Republic of Ireland has many famous cities and sights of interest, notably the capital city of Dublin with its Guiness factory, Malahide Castle, museums and the Fry Model Railway, being one of the largest in the world .

Situated in the beautiful grounds surrounding Malahide Castle, right in the centre of Dublin and well signposted.

The city of Cork just off the south coast is arguably most famous for enabling people to Kiss the Blarney Stone at the nearby Castle of Blarney. Many famous politicians have done so to be granted the gift of eloquence.

Blarney Castle is situated in Blarney Village which is 8 km northwest from Cork city in the South of Ireland. Directions from Cork Airport :- From Airport follow signs for City Centre. From City Centre follow signs for Limerick (N20). Travel for 7 km; exit left (signposted Blarney)

Scotland is a rugged and mountainous country with its own share of beauty and history, and the Scots themselves are known for their firmness, their ginger and red hair, their fondness for eating oats and haggis, for wearing kilts and for playing the bagpipes – though this last item is actually of Irish origin.

Edinburgh, its capital, is graced with a fabulous castle where each year at the end of August a military tattoo is held, a spectacle that draws a huge crowd worldwide each year.

Edinburgh Castle is situated in the centre of Edinburgh and is a short walk from Waverley train station.

The equally imposing Stirling Castle played a key role in the defence and independence of Scotland and much of the film Braveheart was both filmed and based around this fabulous keep.

The nearest major airport to Stirling is at Edinburgh, - 29 miles/47km. From Edinburgh you can get to Stirling either by bus, which runs every hour and is very slow or by train. Trains are every 30 minutes (every hour after 2000 and on Sundays) from Waverley or Haymarket. The Citylink bus costs £4 and takes about an hour, departing from the bus station at St Andrew Square. From Glasgow buses also run hourly and take about 45 minutes. Trains depart at least 3 times per hour, expresses take 27 minutes (See the First ScotRail website for timetable information). Easily reachable by car from both Glasgow(M80/A80/M9) and Edinburgh (using the M9).

The highlands of Scotland also boast one of the world's greatest golf course at Gleneagles, set against a wonderful scenic backdrop.

Gleneagles can be reached along the A9 northbound from Stirling. It also is just a short stroll from its own named rail station.

Scotland's other main sight of interest is of course the Loch Ness, the alleged home of the Loch Ness Monster ( more affectionately called Nessy). Despite millions of visitors coming with their cameras and scientific equipment no one has been able to verify her existence or whereabouts.

The A82 on the north side links Loch Ness is the main trunk route which links Loch Ness along the length of the Great Glen with nearby Inverness – the Capital of the Highlands, in the north, and Glasgow in the south. To reach Loch Ness by rail you can travel to nearby Inverness or Fort William.

In the distant past, people from England who wanted to get married in a hurry, and often without the permission of their parents, would cross the border into Scotland and head to Gretna Green.

Located just off the main motorway route into Scotland (M74). Located only 10 minutes north of Carlisle, one hour from the Lake District, one hour 30 minutes from Glasgow, Edinburgh or Newcastle and two hours 30 minutes from Manchester or Stranraer.

A guided tour of the Scottish Highlands is the other main attraction, where your will be regaled you with stories from its grim and bloody history as you are driven through its scenic hillsides.

Scotland is also home to John O'Groats, commonly mistaken as the most Northerly pinnacle of the UK ( which is actually the Shetland Islands ), whereas its actual claim to fame is that it is the northerly end of the longest distance between two points on the British mainland, Land's End being the other.

Finally in Scotland each year there is the Highland Games, which take place from Cowal to Tomintoul and all points in between, and is a unique mix of sport, culture and social gathering. They comprise a programme of events, piping and Highland dancing competitions and 'heavy events' like the tug-o-war and tossing the caber.

Similarly to Scotland, Wales is another rugged mountainous country. The Welsh are famous for their Celtic dancing, their love of Rugby, close harmonious singing, leeks, harps, sheep and coal mines.

Wales boasts the tallest mountain in the UK, Mount Snowdon, in the region of Snowdonia.

There are lots of walks up to the summit of Snowdon from villages all round the mountain, ranging from brisk walks to full climbing routes with crampons. Mind you for the less energetic, there is always the train from Llanberis to Snowdon's summit.

The Welsh capital of Cardiff is home to many top attractions and a perfect jump point for visiting places such as the Millennium Stadium, the historic castle of Caerphilly, the Brecon Beacons, the Goape adventure park and not forgetting the Big Pit. The Big Pit being both a real coal mine and one of Britain's leading mining museums.

The Big Pit in Blaenavon can be reached by taking the B4246 from Abergavenny or the A4042 from Pontypool, north of Cardiff and Newport.

In north Wales can be found the majestic Caernarfon castle, possibly the most famous of Welsh castle. Its sheer scale and commanding presence easily set it apart from the rest.

The nearest main line station is Bangor, on the North Wales Coast Line from Chester to Holyhead, approximately ten miles from Caernarfon. Caernarfon is on the A487 trunk road and from England take the A55 Expressway from Chester to beyond Bangor; turn off at the second Bangor turn (A4087, also signposted for Caernarfon) and bear left.

Overall England is considered to be generally flat and green by almost everyone's standard and partly because of this and its temperate climate it has played host to a multitude of invaders right down throughout the ages.

Just south of the Scottish border is the narrowest part of the Britain and where historically the Roman Caesar Hadrian had a wall built to prevent the Scots from raiding further south.

National Express coaches run from all over the UK to Newcastle and Carlisle. By car, there are excellent motorway and trunk road links leading to Hadrian's Wall Country including the M6, M1, A1, A7, A68, A69 and A74.

Of all the famous historical sites in England the most important must surely be the monolithic circle of stones at Stonehenge.

From Amesbury, 2 miles west on the junction of A303 and A344/360. The nearest train station to Stonehenge is Salisbury about 9.5 miles away. The buses depart from Heathrow Airport and from Victoria Coach Station in the centre of London. The journey takes about 2 hours. Get off at Amesbury. From there you can either walk (about 2 miles), catch a local bus, or get a taxi.

Another site of ancient magnificence and mystery is the Long Man in Wilmington, East Sussex.

Wilmington is about 2 miles West of Polegate on Lewes Road ( A27 ), and about 5 miles North West of Eastbourne. The nearest mainline railway station is in Polegate.

Also here during the Beltaine time of the year, 1st of May, can also be seen traditional Morris Dancing and dancing round the May-pole, two folk / pagan activities still alive today.

Britain has a number of chalk-cut hill figures but the oldest by far, dating back over 3,000 years, is the White Horse of Uffington in Oxfordshire.

Road Access is the S of B4507, 7 miles West of Wantage. Bus Access is the RH Transport 67 to within 1 mile. The town of Uffington is actually midway between the two nearest mainline railway stations of Swindon and Didcot, both around 18 miles away.

Another example of Romano-British archaeology can be found in the ruins of the Roman Baths at Bath.

The Roman Baths are in the centre of Bath in the West of England. Bath is 100 miles (160km) west of London and 10 miles (16km) east of Bristol. Bath has good coach and rail connections from London and from most major cities in the UK.

In its museum in Reading there resides the Victorian period replica of the Bayeux Tapestry, chronicling the successful invasion and occupation by the Norman King, William the Conqueror, in 1066.

The Museum of Reading is only a two-minute walk from Reading Central rail and bus stations and is well signposted from both.

The historic town is Stratford-Upon-Avon, is notable because it was the birthplace of William Shakespeare, and has tried its best to keep its heritage intact and still displays many links to its most famous son. Stratford Upon Avon.

Henley Street is situated about 800 meters East of the main railway station, just off Meer Street or Wood Street.

Prior to the Norman invasion, England's capital moved home several times but one of the only place now really worth visiting for its former claim of being a capital is the historic city of York.

York is a fairly large city and has many places of interest in their own right, including castles and cathedrals, but spare a thought for the Yorvik Viking Centre, which though small is ideal for spending a few minutes as long as the queues are not too long.

Head into York on the A19 into the City centre. The nearest car park is next to Clifford's Tower. JORVIK is then a 2 minute walk away in Coppergate Square. It is also 1 mile from the main train station.

One place that claims to have been of major political importance was the Holy Island of Lindisfarne. Lindisfarne is unlike any other place you are ever likely to visit and still has records and evidence of its Viking Raids.

Holy Island is linked to the mainland by a long causeway. Twice each day the tide sweeps in from the North Sea and covers the road. By road, proceed along the main A1 roadway to the crossroad at Beal which is approximately 8 miles South of Berwick-upon-Tweed and about 60 miles (halfway) between Newcastle-upon-Tyne and Edinburgh. The nearest mainline station is at Berwick-upon-Tweed on the London (Kings Cross) to Edinburgh GNER line. Local bus Route 477 operates to the Island from Berwick Station on most days during Summer months but sometimes as few as once a week between September and May.

The legendary home of the famous archer and people's hero Robin Hood is believed to trace its roots to Sherwood Forest near Edwinstowe in Nottinghamshire. Today there are still three royal parks in the region that are home to many wild birds and animals such as deer as well as 1,000 year old trees.

The gateway to Sherwood Forest is Edwinstowe and the area is best reached by car from the M1 or A1 via the A614. The nearest mainline railway station is Newark, which has good rail links with London, Nottingham, Lincoln and Scotland. It is about 1 hour 20 minutes from London. There are also National buses that leave from Nottingham.

England still has hundreds of Castles and ruins of castles, far too many to list and detail here, but I will include a few of the more impressive ones here.

Tintagel Castle, in NW Cornwall, often inspires dreams of Camelot, King Arthur, and Merlin. In the bay below the castle is a dark dank cave said to be the haunting place of the ghost of Merlin.

The castle can be found at Tintagel Head, along a half mile of uneven track from Tintagel, however no vehicles can access it directly. Tintagel itself can be reached from the B3263 from Boscastle and via the B3314 from A39 by Camelford.

Leeds Castle is acclaimed, and in my view rightly so, as the most romantic castle in England, and is located in south-east England, built on two adjacent islands in the river Len.

Furthermore it is perhaps one of the most entertaining and spectacular ones in the country, with year round events such as jousting, falconry, hot air ballooning and its own impressive natural maze to get lost in.

7 miles east of Maidstone, Junction 8 of the M20 motorway just 1 hour from London, 30 minutes from the Channel Tunnel, Channel Ports and Dartford River Crossing. By coach from London Victoria, Coach 021 departs at 9am stopping at various pickup points in South London. Southeastern runs frequent train services to and from Bearsted and a coach shuttle service run by Spot Hire is available from the station.

Set high above the famous white cliffs of Dover, Dover Castle boasts a colourful and fascinating history. Here you can visit the labyrinth of Secret WWII Wartime tunnels built deep within the cliffs as well as the older atmospheric medieval underground tunnels. Also here is one of Europe's best-preserved Roman lighthouses.

Dover Castle is on the east side of Dover, a short walk or drive uphill from the town. It is 1.5 miles or 2.4 km from the Dover Priory railroad station; from there, you can connect to the castle on bus 90, 91, or 111 of Stagecoach East Kent.

Yet another historic town is Rochester-Upon-Medway, notably the birthplace of Charles Dickens, and because of this it has tried its best to keep its heritage intact and still displays many links to its most famous son.

Eastgate House can be found just in the middle of Rocheser High Street, just two minutes walk from the mainline train station and is clearly signposted.

Old Romney, now New Romney, was one of the five Kentish coastal towns that made up the Five Ports (in Norman French the "Cinque Ports"), before other smaller towns joined and became associated members or "Ancient Towns".

New Romney can be found on the south coast of Kent, on the A259 in between Hastings and Folkestone and is linked to London via Ashford.

The scenic Spa town of Royal Tunbridge Wells is another example of Georgian beauty and architecture with its many gardens, castles and converted oast houses.

Tunbridge and Royal Tunbridge Wells can be easily reached by train or by taking the A21 off the M25 from London.

The Cotswolds - The Cotswolds are an area of England in the west midlands near the Welsh Border.

Popular with both the English themselves and visitors from all over the world, the Cotswolds are well-known for gentle hillsides ('wolds'), sleepy villages and for being so 'typically English'.

Similarly with its rustic appeal is the Lake District, another area of rolling hillsides and green fields, this time in the far north west of England. As an added lure the Lake District is also the home of The World of Beatrix Potter attraction.

The World of Beatrix Potter can be found right in the heart of the Windermere, Cumbria and is well signposted. To get to Kendal you can take the train to nearby Kendal or take the A591 also from Kendal.

However, England is more than just its history and boasts many other exciting places to visit, such as Amusement Parks, Zoo's and much more.

The Eden Project is a complex of indoor Biomes that house entire micro-environments and also house a variety of annual events.

Buses that run regularly to Eden from St Austell Railway Station are the First 101 and the Western Greyhound 527, similarly the Western Greyhound 527 runs from Newquay, which during the summer is a big attraction for surfers. It is also well signposted along the A30 from Exeter and from the A391/390 from Plymouth.

For those who like animals you can spend a thrilling day out in Kent at either Howletts Wildlife Park - a 90 acre adventure in beautiful ancient parkland, or Port Lympne Zoo.

Howletts Wild Animal Park is located in Bekesbourne, Kent in the South East of England, just three miles south of Canterbury. Port Lympne Wild Animal & Safari Park is located in the South East of England near Hythe in Kent.

England has many tailor made holiday villages, but the CentreParcs is considered by many to be the biggest and the best, with its 4 tranquil resorts each set in 400 acres of natural woodland. Each park has a wide variety of sporting and outdoor pursuits to enjoy and is specially set up for families with young children.

There are four sites to chose from throughout the UK, being Longleat in Wiltshire, Whinfell in Cumbria, Sherwood in Nottingham and Elvenden in suffolk.

The caves at Wookey hole offer a whole host of attractions from witches covens to bold pirate caves in addition to its very own Amusement Park.

Wookey Hole is 2 miles from the beautiful medieval city of wells, and 20 miles from bath(A39), Bristol(A37) and Weston Super Mare (A371). From the M5 Exit junction 22 from north or south and follow brown tourist signs.

The Devils Arse is Britains largest cave and can be found in the Peak District just West of Sheffield.

Peak Cavern, Castleton, Hope Valley, Derbyshire. The nearest railway line is at Hope station, run by Devonshire Rail. Drivers can reach it by heading West on the A57 from Sheffield and then taking the A6013 at Ashopton before taking the A6187.

For anyone feeling a littler more energetic and feels like monkeying around then why not go along to one of the 25 GoApe outdoor leisure centres around the country and discover your own high wire jungle adventure.

Although the UK does not have its own Disneyland, it does have plenty of medium and large size Amusement Parks right throughout the country.

The largest amusement in the UK is Alton Towers in the midlands.

The Alton Towers Resort is very easy to find, with exceptional links for both road and rail. The train stations nearest to the Resort are Stoke-on-Trent, Derby and Uttoxeter and if you are travelling by road, the resort is between the M1 and the M6.

Closer to London is Chessington World of Adventures & Zoo in Surrey.

Chessington is situated 12 miles from London on the A243, just 2 miles from the A3 and M25 (junction 9 or 10). Car parking is free. Chessington is served by a regular bus service. Take the 465 bus from Kingston to Chessington, or the 467 bus from Epsom to Chessington. Regular South West Train services run from Waterloo, Clapham Junction and Wimbledon. Take the train to Chessington South Station. The park is approximately 10 minutes walk from the station.

Another of the UK's top parks also in Surrey is Thorpe Park Amusement Park and Zoo.

Just 20 miles from central London. Thorpe Park is situated between junctions 11 and 13* of the M25. (*Note: Access from Junction 12 of the M25 is not possible). Regular South West Trains run from Waterloo direct to Staines. The 950 shuttle link operates from Staines station to the Park running every half hour. Trains also run regularly from Reading and Guildford to Staines Station. Staines Bus station is a 5 minute walk from the railway station. Buses for Thorpe Park depart from Stand 2, however, the 950 Thorpe Park Express departs directly from Staines Railway Station.

Just outside Birmingham near Tamworth can be found Drayton Manor Theme Park & Zoo.

Drayton Manor Park is near Tamworth, Staffordshire on the A4091, just off the A38 / A446, J9 M42 & Exit T2 M6 Toll. Summer CrossCountry trains run a bus service direct from Tamworth station into the theme park. For details of bus services to Drayton Manor, visit Arriva or Travel West Midlands.

Windsor's very own Legoland is a world of lego based adventure and fun for all the family.

Legoland Windsor is situated in the south of the UK within the county of Berkshire and just 2 miles from the centre of Windsor and offers free parking. From London, M25 take the turning off at Junction 13.

Being an Island, Britain has a number of beaches and seaside towns that are great for a weekend break or a day trip, each with their own identity and charm.

Great Yarmouth, in Norfolk, is the ideal destination for many with its pleasure beach and caravan parks, and is only narrowly pipped by Lowestoft as being Britains most Easterly town.

Great Yarmouth can be reached Eastwards along the A47 or North on the A12, and can equally be easily reached by train from either Norwich or Ipswich.

Norfolk is also famous for its Broads, a winding complex of narrow waterways that altogether span hundreds of miles right across the country and annually attract tourists who enjoy the experience of a holiday on a floating longboat or barge.

Although the Kentish town of Margate of today is only a shadow of its former glory as Britain's most fashionable beachfront towns, it has recently tried to reinvent itself and is staging something of a comeback. Margate

The town of Brighton in Sussex is another seaside town that is experiencing a resurgence in popularity thanks to its becoming the official gay and lesbian capital of the UK, and also unofficially the UK's least religious town.

Blackpool pleasure beach, up near Preston in the north midlands, might not be what it once was, but it can still trace it roots as one of the UK's foremost tourist resorts.

The British people have always held a real passion for sport and can boast some of the world's greatest sporting venues. Without question the largest sport followed is football and hundreds of thousands each week go to support their team. There are 57 stadiums in the UK, playing host to 92 professional league teams.

Of these stadiums, the one that is universally loved and praised as the National stadium is Wembley, in North London, and can be reached easily by road or from the adjacent Metro line underground train station.

The grand prix circuit of Brands Hatch ( also known as Silverstone ) has been the venue of many Formula 1, Formula 3000 and motorsport races and can be found in Towcester, Northamptonshire.

Brandshatch can be easily reached by car on the A43 southbound from Towcester. By rail it is around 20km from the nearest stations of Banbury or Old Wolverton.

There are 68 horse racetracks in the UK. Each year the Grand National steeplechase horserace is held at Aintree just a few miles north of Liverpool.

Aintree is easily reached by its own railway station or from the A59 that runs right alongside the course.

Although not quite as popular as it was in recent years, there is still a warm support for the sport of Greyhound Racing and it can be seen at any of the 26 dog tracks that are still in operation in the UK.

Since its inception most of the worlds top snooker players are from the UK, playing and training in any of the thousands of clubs throughout the country.

The world Snooker championship is held each year at the Crucible Theatre in Sheffield.

The Crucible, Studio, and Lyceum Theatres form a complex situated on the same site in the centre of Sheffield, close to the Millennium and Graves Art Galleries and the Central Library.

The other long serving British love is alcohol, and as such there are around 65,000 bars or pubs in the UK, and no village, town or city is complete without one. While the names range from the common to the bizarre they universally share many of the same characteristics of owning an adjoining garden, dart board, pool table, card table, open fireplace, piano, sofas, live stage musicians and a jukebox.

Although perhaps not recognised worldwide for its culinary skills, the traditional British fish and chip shop is still a popular institution and can be found up and down the country, as can be found the mobile Ice Cream vans.

England is linked to continental Europe by several services and a single rail line that goes under the channel through the Channel Tunnel.

The English rail link for the Eurotunnel is found at Folkestone and takes around 35 minutes to arrive in Calais.

Latest Update

I arrived back in the UK on April 11th of this year and in the four months that I have been back quite a lot has changed, but then again nothing is different.

One bit of good fortune is that I have now been searched from every US state, possibly through a bit of nudging on my part, but never-the-less that fact that I can say that people from every country that I travelled through and all across the americas, both north and south, have logged on at time or another makes me feel that I have achieved something truly amazing.

I cannot describe what it means to say that although I have not really changed the world, at least I have reached out to the world and in response the world reached back.

My plans to move to China are proceeding smoothly, with my several teach myself Mandarin Audio CD's and books due to arrive in the post any day now and my TEFL course almost complete ( Teach English as a Foreign Language ).

I have always been one who listens to the opinions of others that I respect, but at the same time I have always tried to follow my heart and although my life has not been the most comfortable or simplest I can truly say that I have lived my life to the fullest and have no real regrets for my past actions.

Right now my daily plans are to continue writing my book, spend as much time with my British family and friends as I can, which includes getting photos of us all together for momento's, and then getting through the day as positively as possible without spending any money.

Life is not always easy, but its at times like these that I look back and enjoy the good times I have had that much more.

Last nights party

Last night I was invited by my former work colleague to spend a few hours with her and some friends in a trendy nightspot in London.

 

The reason for the gathering was that she "won" a competition where the prize was a free bottle of champaigne, 8 shots and a platter of food, and although I saw through it immediately for what it really was, a great bit of advertising, but the fact that my friend was going to be there with a bunch of her girlfriends meant that it promised to be a good night anyway.

 

What I didnt realise what exactly how great the night was going to be and how it typifies why I love the latin culture and think generally us Brits have got it all about face.

 

You don't believe me. Well, picture it, a young and attractive model with a group of her equally attractive female friends outnumbering me and the other three guys who came along more than 2-1, in a bar with a light snack and two rounds of drinks provided for free.

 

Now none of the girls got jealous or started acting like they were up their own asses, none of the guys tried to hold a drinking contest to see who could get shit faced the quickest and in the end we were all laughing, joking and playing silly games half cut yet all still under control of our limbs and minds.

 

I have always had a fond spot for balloons, but the game we played put all other games to shame. Not only was it very amusing and enjoyable to see all these attractive young women trying to play keepie-uppy with a balloon ( without using their hands ), which often meant rolling around on the sofas trying to kick it with their high heels, but the loser had to perform a dare which took the game to a new level.

 

As most of us were in relationships, regardless of if our partners were present or not, the dares were specifically kept light but could involve trying to get a guys number, having to dirty dance with no music, having to get a barman to buy you a drink, asking a stranger how well endowed he was, having to frisk the doorman and having to pretend to pole dance up against a wall.

 

It is almost impossible for me now to clearly evoke how much fun it was, but rest assured that if you are a person with a pulse, a happy attitude and good heart you would have loved to have been invited to this party and if you missed it you would have been kicking yourself for weeks to come.

 

All I can say is that from the moment I arrived I didnt want to leave and only did so because my cash funds were running low and I hate having to take the last train home to Gillingham so whenever possible I catch an earlier one.

'Natalie Dybisz'

Well if I thought that my multiplicity photo idea was new I was of course wrong, but also Natalie has proved that they can be very well done and attract a lot of interest both online and financially.
Apparently she had had over 4 million hits for just one of her photos, which clearly shows that she did heaps better at advertising than I had, but in time ... who knows.

A Double Edged Sword

I am beginning to accept that my trip around the world was a bit of a double edged sword, it was both the best time in my life and yet due to lack of planning about my return to the UK I am now on the verge of losing my house and financial ruin.

I cannot say that I regret a single day of travelling, yet the fact that I clearly had not raised enough funds to adequately cover my trip and the return to the UK has meant I am being chased daily by my debtors, have received numerous letters threatening legal action and my house will soon be repossessed unless something changes for the better and fast.

I should have never remortgaged my house in the past so that there was precious little equity left, I should have left enough funds aside to cope with emergency repairs / renovations to my property and i should have been more careful with my funds while abroad, perhaps going to
restaurants and cinemas less often and instead buying cheap food from supermarkets.

While it may be true that had I left my departure date off for another couple of years I might never have got the opoprtunity to go, as it is I am now feeling that despite not selling my house I still had pretty much burned my bridges back in the UK and that I should have never
bothered coming back and instead stayed in either South America or Asia and tried to make a new life for myself over there.

As always, things seem much clearer in hindsight and I can see now that despite a years planning and savings I was still in no fit position to go travelling with the current financial crisis already starting to bite down.

My other main personal failing is that I did not bother to study when I was working in London and so am not ACCA qualified and thus the chance of walking into another accounts job was always going to be much harder than it should have been, as has proven by the number of rejection emails I have received.

My biggest fear now is that I do not want to go from one mistake to the next, and yet with each day my choice of options is dwindling.

Just to recap - I have a house with no equity one missed payment and in need of electrical and damp work repairs, I have no job or savings to speak of, I have furniture stored at family and friends, I have no girlfriend or dependents here in the UK and I am in debt to a number of banks and credit cards.

A White Elephant

When I was in Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur to be exact, I went to an Elephant reserve where we got to ride, feed and swim with them and from my guide I also learned the true origin of the White Elephant, and why it is considered a double edged gift.

Years ago White Elephants were considered the ultimate prize and status symbol of power and fortune due to their extreme rareness, and all the Royal households in the Far East had small collections of them.

However, because of their extreme rareness, their more select diet and grooming requirements, the Asian royalty also saw them as a way of politely causing financial discomfort to any courtiers they disliked or had under perfomed.

The giving such an elephant was considered a very generous and favourable act, but in reality for the poor unfortunate who was now lumbered with the expensively demanding beast it was just the start of his financial misfortune.

In a way it is like the modern day equivalent of giving a very classic car or introducing an extremely attractive WAG to one of your friends, at first it seems you are doing them a great favour and service, but all too soon the high maintenance of them quickly overshadows any benefit of having such a prize and become just a huge financial drain.

The real punishment though was that it was the height of rudeness and ill manners to refuse of give away such a gift and even the burial of said elephant was a lavish affair that could not be scrimpt or done cheaply without causing offence and dishonour.

And so it is that the saying comes down the generations that if you are landed with an unwanted white elephant in your lap you will have a hard time getting rid of it easily.

London Interviews

Last week a family member of my Peruvian friend came over but sadly I had absolutely no forward notice and was unable to meet her in London, but in an effort to still help out as much as possible I provided her with a list of some of the top places to visit and how to reach them via the Metro, such as :-

Buckingham Palace, Covent Garden, Royal Household Cavalry, Big Ben & the Houses of Parliament, Westminster Abbey, Trafalgar Square, St Pauls Cathedral, Royal Albert Hall, Hyde Park, HMS Belfast, HMS Illustrious, The Cutty Sark, Imperial War Museum, Hamleys, Harrods, Leicester Square, London Eye, Madam Tussauds, The House of Sherlock Holmes, Milennium Dome, Tower of London, London Dungeon, Scotland Yard

Now months before I left on my RTW trip I made a blog entry where I took some photos of the route between London Victoria and my office near Oxford Circus, but this was more to show that people dont pay enough attention to the beauty around them rather than to show off how great was London.

With this in mind, I took a second look at it and I realised that in fact I hadn't been to most of them myself, or at least not in the last decade, and in my experience I know that actually this is pretty much the same with locals all around the world.

So as I had a couple of interviews up town to go to on Tuesday, I made it my mission to try and get to to visit a few more of these places in between going to the work agency interviews. Plus to top it all off I was able to meet up with some friends during lunch and after work, even ended up tagging along to a friend of my friends birthday bash so I really did manage to make the best of all worlds.

Catching a late train home brought back its own range of memories and it was only a shame that the kebab house at the end of our street was closed when I got back or I would have had a meat and chips plus a can of Dr Pepper just to nicely round off the day.

The only other two tiny things that marred it were that I didnt get into London early enough for the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace, that the beef eaters at the Tower of London were only in traditional uniform inside and not outside ( for a freebe photo opportunity ) and that the Cutty Shark is currently totally under cover being in the middle of its restoration process.

Farewell Dom Deluise

Farewell Dom, you will be missed by millions who you made smile and laugh down the ages.

 

http://www.smh.com.au/news/entertainment/film/dom-deluise-dead-at-75/2009/05/06/1241289218731.html

 

I remember him best for being Captain Chaos in the movie Cannonball Run, but he was known for many roles and appeared in many tv specials and guest spots.

 

Laugh, love and be merry always 

Now comes the hard part

Well I saved up and planned ... chased the dream and succeeded ... took the photos and updated the blog ... and even completed the age old saying of "bought the T-shirt", so now the only thing left to do is to "write the book".

Although I have all my blog notes, my memory, my photos, the maps and the receipts from with which to draw my inspiration from, now rewriting it all into a neat, crisp, readable and sellable piece of literature is going to be the hardest part of all.

I will want to get it right, to inject just the right amount of humour and relate enough of the stories to keep the audience interested and not lose the pace of the book ... it will be a hard thing and although I know I can and will give it a go, I am just not sure how long it will take me and if by the time I have finished I will like the end result enough to say that I gave it my best and did myself proud.

Because of this, and because my life is back to being a bit boring and hum drum at the moment, I doubt I will be updating the blog with many entries regulary ... i'll just be too busy with this part of the project.

Unknown in Nebraska

Nebraska & Montana - whats wrong with my blog ???

I've just clawed back all my blog entries and set them up on one file in chronological order and using a basic A4 word document it comes to around 350 pages and over 280,000 words.

The scary part is that I was writing very little on the first part of the journey and so after neatening it all up, rehashing some and then filling it into a proper balances book will only add to its size not shrink it - and thats without even a single photo and I was thinking of at least one per country !!!

I never thought about how big this project could become and now I am so very glad that I kept my blog and took so many photos as if now I had to write the whole thing off the from scratch with just a few notes on each place it would end up less than half the book it now might possibly be.

On other news I have contacted my mortgage people who have refused to offer me any help as I am not in current residence of my house, so my only chance of still being able to hang on to it are looking slimmer by the day.

The credit card people were almost as bad, merely demanding money each time I try to call them up and discuss it with the vague promise of being able to sort something out after yet another payment is received.

I have updated my cv and applied for a few jobs, both local and London, but I really feel that I have weeks not months left for things to turn around financially before I have almost no option but to go voluntary bankrupt or whatever they want to call it nowadays !?!

On the photos front I have compiled a disc of around 900 photos, fairly evenly split between each city and much like my writing I can see the quality vastly improve week on week.

When I just rechecked my google analytics I am still getting around 6 hits per day which isnt bad seing as I have not been travelling for a fortnight now and as far as the USA goes it is only Nebraska and Montana that still have noone who is even remotely interested in my blog ... not sure why :o(

Paperwork and reunions

The last week has great as I have got to spend plenty of time with family and either through design or random chance I have also bumped into plenty of local friends, leaving me a little more free next week to travel into London and after dropping my CV off to the various london agencies see which of my London chums I can catch up with first.

Racism and Racists

I have now been travelling for around seven months and I have discovered that I am becoming a bit of a racist, but in my defence I would say that it is a racism born from being used, abused and mistreated by those who I put my trust in and should have been on my side when all others were indifferent.

When I book online to check out a hotel, I was chosing the hostels and hotels with not the best price, but a low price combined with the best ratings to ensure that my stay would be as smooth as possible and that perhaps I could avoid being ripped by the local hawks and touts that can be found in most airports and major train stations, especially near places considered of high importance on the tourist trail.

When I arrived in Delhi my hotel had arranged for me an airport pickup and charged me 440 rupees, the standard being 250 but it was early in the morning so they felt they could increase the price accordingly.

During the ride into town the taxi driver said that if I wanted to go to Acra then I had best use their personal taxi service as the trains were very busy, hot, expensive and booked full for weeks in advance. I thanked his for his advice and took it under offer.

When I arrived at the hotel the owner said the same thing and so I originally cancelled the trip til in the end the tour desk clerk convinced me that it would be worth it and again that the train was not possible as it would be very hard to book for me and be a very long, expensive and uncomfortable journey even if I could book a seat.

With three people all telling me the same advise I decided to trust them and so did not go for a wander to find the local train statoin myself, but agreed to go with them that day. The car's air conditioning was not working properly, it broke down twice and the traffic on the way back extended a 3 hour journey into a 5 hour journey.

That was yesterday.

Today I had no plans and as I finished my blogging early, due to being woken very early by the pigeons mating outside my room, I decided to go for a walk and randomly found the train station after a bit of walk just at the very end of the road that it was off of. At the station was a nice big blue sign saying that international tourists should go upstairs to the booking office and avoid talking to touts or locals saying that the tourist place is closed.

When I went upstairs I easily found the place and within ten minutes I got to talk to a clerk who confirmed that there were several trains that left for Acra each day, that a luxury train including a meal and air conditioning was only 400 rupees each way and that I could book as many tickets as I wanted for whichever day I wanted, including today, quickly and easily then and there, and if I booked in advance and didn't mind slumming it a bit I could get a ticket for a normal train even cheaper.

My hotel charged me 4200 rupees for a return journey that was long, boring, hot, without working air conditioning and without a meal. Five minutes up the road I coud easily get a ticket for 800 that would not be delayed by traffic and offered all the luxuries and comforts that the stuck in traffic private car ride would not.

When I went back and confronted the tour desk and hotel owner they were both very blazais about it all, suggesting that it was my fault, denying that they put any pressure on me to book with then, denying that they blatantly lied about how difficult or expensive the train was and refused to give even a partial refund for their treachery.

And remember all this was from a hostel voted #1 in Delhi in 2007 and was still receiving favourable reports when compared to other places in Delhi.

People who claim that racism is bad and wrong are often suffering from the bleeding hearts syndrome and are people who have never been on the rough end of trying to deal with the locals fairly and honestly. I believed that the hotel I was staying in would offer good advice and failing that would at least offer some apology and partial refund if I was unsatisfactory with their tours or advice given, but what I got was a rude brush off from a staff who unanimously gave me the go-tell-someone-who-gives-a-fuck atittude.

Asuming that the people who gave the hostel good reviews had even one brain cell between them it is highly likely that they gave it a good rating after visiting other places and feeling that this place was good, yet under my analysis it is not good just possibly better than the other local hostels and hotels.

Thus it feel that it is unwise to trust most indians, that I do not want to get close to most indians, that I do not want to visit India again and that if I never saw an Indian again it would not be a bad thing. If that makes me a racist then so be it, but I say that they started it and when confronted with their own lies and unscrupulous behavoir were neither apologietic, understanding nor made any effort to remedy the situation so that I would leave on happier terms.

All men may be made equally, but by their behavior, beliefs and attitutude to those around then some show themselves to be lesser men than others.

If as a race of people you live off lying and cheating others then do not expect to be granted the same sympathy or compassion that those from other races benefit from, and especially not from the very people from whom you treated unfairly in the past simply by because you feel you want it. Instead be ready to receive nothing short of contempt, distrust and dislike.

Unless and until you as a race can first learn to treat others fairly I feel you have no ethical or moral right whatsover to complain when you receive less than an equal treatment away from home soil.

I began my travels with my eyes and heart open to all and a dislike for no race, only individuals. However time and again I have been cheated and lied to and when I find out that far from being unexpected this behavoir is considered normal I can only feel that those responsible are sadly not a disgrace to their race but instead a reflection of them as a whole.

Google Analytics

Out of curiosity I opened the date range on my blog analytics to see who has been reading it since I first started travelling.

Over 40% of my traffic was directed (not via a random search ) only 40% were repeat readers, it has been viewed in 96 countries from around the world and specifically in 48 states of the USA, however finally more than 60% of all hits was from UK based. Finally there was an most frequent rate of 10 hits per day.

Maybe not world shattering figures, but fairly impressive none the less, especially as the travel blog is all about me and my experiences and not just name dropping for the sake of raising awareness, though maybe I should do a little more of that in the future?!?

I also noticed the other day that I had reached the end of my T-shirt, meaning that of the 80 or so cities that I originally planned to visit, ending with Beijing, have now been passed and so I am truly and officially on my way back home.

On the road I decided that I could not hang around long enough to sort out a visa for Russia, although now that I am here in Beijing I probably could, and so arranged a few flights to hop back to blighty via Delhi, Dubai, Cairo and these are all that I have left to visit.

It has been an absolutely amazing adventure, despite the frequent showers, I have met some wonderful people, some friendly people and a few that now hold a special place in my life and always will come what may.

I am not sure how best to write up the book when I return, with a part of me wants to make it into a fictional fantasy storybook for kids, but I know that I need it to have some sort of edge if it is going to be snapped up by a publication house.

If my efforts fail to impress the powers that be, then I will go self publishing, at least for this one book, and so the only thing I am realy worried about screwing up is the dedication page, I want it to mean something and let those who form a part of it know without ruining their public anonimity which I have up til now done my darnest to maintain.

Something along the lines of a simple "to those who I met and made me feel especially welcome in distant shores a big thanks and you know who you are" doesn't quite seem to cut the mustard for me but still it might be the best way to phrase it.

Hidden costs of travel

When I planned my trip around the world I did my best to budget for the trip. Talking to friends, travel guides and the internet allowed me to check out the costs of flights, accomodation, food and then I added an extra allowance for trips and luxuries and figured out how much I thought I would spend, but my experience travelling has taught me that these were all pie in the sky prices are are not to be counted upon.

One of the big pulls of visiting further afield places is the lure of the inexpensive costs of foreign countries, and knowing that countries in the Orient, Africa and South America are considered by western standards to be poor tricked me into thinking that it therefore follows that it should be cheap to travel there, but this has rarely been the case.

True it is cheaper than travelling through countries like Australia, the USA or central Europe but cheaper does not mean cheap, and I have decided to jot down a few of the many reasons why this is not always the case.

Pre-travel costs. Ignoring all the private costs that people have to pay to keep their normal lives going on back in their own home town ( ie, rent still needs to be paid whether you are home or not and not everyone gets paid holiday, kennel fees for domestic pets, etc. ) there are often a slew of small little costs that creep into the mix before you even step food outside your own doorstep such as visa's, travel inocculations, travel guides, power adapters, mosquito repellent, travel insurance and foreign travellers cheques.

Few people are neighbours of airports and thus getting to an airport, and on the return leg getting back from the airport also is a small but above zero cost.

Arriving by flights. Almost without exception the cheapest flights to a country require either a rediculous arrival time, a stop over in different city or arrival in an airport so far away from anything that you want to visit that it will cost extra to get from this far flung airport to the city centre.

Then you have to include the travel agency fee, flight tax, airport departure tax, possible business of first class upgrades, onboard food or drinks surcharge, fuel surcharge and headset surcharge, some of these being optional and others not.

Once you reach your chosen city, by whatever means of travel you chose, you still have to get from the point of arrival to your hostel or hostel which can mean either a privately rented car ( plus yet more insurance and petrol ), public transport or a private taxi.

Not every city has a decent public transport system, with even fewer having decent evening / night time schedules, and the unless you are lucky enough to have arrived at an airport or train station that has its own fixed fare taxi rate to reach your accomodation you wil often have to haggle with a local taxi driver who'se ability to speak or understand English often evaporates the moment you sit down.

Metered taxi drivers are notorious for taking a longer route than necessary or getting themselves stuck in traffic to rack up the fare and I have even heard of some taxis charging an airport carpark surcharge or highway toll surcharge.

Bargaining for a fixed fare is often even more expensive as you have you have no idea exactly how far away your destination is thus how much is a fair price and on more than one occasion I have been screwed over by not fully understanding the exchage rate and ending up paying an arm and a leg for a ten minute ride. My worse personal experience was paying over £80 for a fifteen minute taxi ride to a hotel from an airport and then it ended up being the wrong hotel.

As a bit of side advice, more often than not taxi drivers in foreign cities are not to be trusted and it is best if you dont even try to talk to them as they will often try to first befriend you and then either convince you to change hotels to one their friend owns ( to receive a commission ), take a detour to their friends shop or talk you into using them to visit a place of interest with them that wil be much more than if you just picked up a different taxi from outside your accomodation especially if they know that you are an easy touch and have already been fleeced on the fare.

Hotels or hostels are the next place where costs both upfront and hidden rack up. As few people want to visit a place during their rainy season, most hotels and hostels know this and have a high season increment.

The cheaper hostels and guest houses are often extremely hard to reach as few taxi drivers will admit to knowing where they are and more than a few are very badly sign posted so you can end up going round and round in circles trying to find them.

Generally the cheaper places will also be the ones furthest from the things that you want to visit and so even if you save a buck or two on the room you end up paying way more getting to and from each day by taxi, and further out also often means off the edge of the crappy tourist map that you managed to pick up someplace.

Forgetting inclusive resorts / hotels, I have found that the price you see is rarely the price you end up paying. Single person supplements for rooms have been the bain of my hostel and guest house experience and I have had to pay double or treble for a two or three bed room on more than one occasion.

Without being able to speak the local language and have an intimate knowledge of every last cheap b&b means that you end up staying in the ones you know about or find while wandering around, which are rarely the cheapest available.

Then come the in room extras. Wanting a room that is not next to a power generator a noisy elevator or at the top of the a long flight of steps increases the price, as do most of the following :- air conditioning / fan ( sometimes a must if you actually want to get any sleep ), bed sheets, towel, tv, refrigerator, locker, wifi access or private bathroom.

Plenty of places I have been too have asked for either leaving a credit card, passport or cash as a key deposit, and I hate having to wait hours or pay extra to arrive outside of standard office hours. The cheapest places rarely have internet access so you cannot book in advance, except by phone, and will be fully booked if you just turn up and try to check in, or only have one room left which will be their delux room that is double ore treble their standard room rate.

Food and drink is the last of the big unexpected hikes that you are likely to face

I will not argue wherever you can find people you will also come across a dingy market stall or street corner vendor that will sell you a plate / bowl of something nondescript and often unidentifyable that passes for life sustaining food, but while it is certainly adventurous to try to local gourmet delights, my general advice is to avoid such places unless you have a cast iron stomuch or enjoy having diarrhea.

Similarly it is often wise to avoid drinking directly from cans, using ice cubes or eating fresh salad that has been washed in local water that is usually not as pure as your body is expecting.

So once you recover from your first bought of "trying the local delicacies" your choices are slim, either stick to something your body is used to, like McDonalds or Wendy's, risk even more food poisoning or eating in places that are a little more upmarket and thus more expensive than where many of the locals eat.

Visits to special sites of interest or city tours can be done a number of ways, booked in advance through an agency, by hiring a taxi or tuk tuk for a day or just getting a map and going it alone but in the end they all seem to cost more than they should and each have problems.

Travel agencies are usually expensive and often mean waking up early to then spend ages waiting around to form up into big groups with other travellers where you are then taken to a carefully selected number of places at specific times, often via comission based shops, markets or restaurants, and listen to some tour guide who will tell you plenty of useless information and skip over the bits that you most want to know all about.

Hiring a private taxi or tuk tuk for the day can be as expensive as an organised tour if you want a driver that speaks your language and has a god knowledge of the sites of interest.

Cheaper drivers either dont speak the language or have little or nothing to say about where you are visiting and often they either make stuff up or remain mute when questioned, and few are able to say if the place will be open on the day that you arrive or how much the entrance fee will be if any.

I have noticed that outside of Europe there are often special discounts on entrance fees for locals, sometimes even no charge at all or just a fraction of what a tourist is forced to pay, and without a guide often you have to queue up for longer and then even once you are in you then have to find your own way around and maybe miss some of the sites relevant or important features.

Doing it totally on your own is the cheapest option is almost always cheapest but the one more open to frustration and dissapointment. Although some places have taxis or tuk tuks everywhere and all offering a fair price, other places only have taxis in a few places or have those who deliberaretly raise their prices knowing that almost all of their passengers will be rich tourists willing to pay over the odds.

Wandering around trying to find my way to or from someplace guided by a map that is out of date, geographically inaccurate and without street names that make any sense have left me at my wits end on more than one occasion and at times to escape from the pouring rain or scorching heat I have ended up jumping into the first taxi that I came across, regardless of price, to either find a way back to civilization and familiar streets.

Finally there is the worldwide trick / habit, of not actually having any price labels on produce and thus a travellers local knowledge and bargaining skills are put to test on a regular basis.

Everything from a postcard, bottle of water, taxi fare, entrance fee, black market item increase to asking ( bribing ) the police / government officials to do their job faster than an ice-age eternity often involve having to negotiate with a local who has the clear advantages of not only knowing the cost price but knowing where the balance between supply and demand actually rests and thus can set their price from a fair fraction markup to as much as their greed feels they can extort from the hapless of unfortunate visitor.

There is no better teacher than experience for educating a person on exactly how best to haggle, but looking poor, speaking the local lingo, asking around ( from a neutral person ) for what the going rate, hiding your desire / desperation and never accepting their first offer no matter how reasonable it may seem are all good starting points.

Also don't be fooled by their appearance as they are paying the same game as you and no doubt will be looking much poorer than they actually are. If you are finding it hard to believe, just think about how a girl who works in a restaurant or street stall during the day transforms when its nighttime and she is out with her friends or hitting the nightclubs / pickup joints.

The same woman who seemed poor, dirty and wearing cheap clothes one minute suddenly looks like a thousand bucks when decked out in fancy clothes, shoes, hair done up and makeup the next.

The golden rule to remember is that no matter how friendly a person appears, or who referred them, no one goes into business to lose money and a person will never sell an item or service less than it costs them to offer so they will always be looking to make a profit, and of course the bigger the profit the better for them.

I could go on, but I think you have got the point. All in all, travel can be a wonderful and mind expanding experience but it is never as cheap as it should be and you would be wise to ensure that any budget is both well researched and never the full extend of how much you can afford to pay, merely an approximate guideline on how you plan to proceed with enough in reserve to pay for those unexpecting hidden costs that hit you from left field.